I must confess, I wasn’t expecting it. By no means is this a definitive parenting guide or a dad knows it all claim! But I do have an opinion. I love to get some solid facts for a discussion versus writing into thin air. When researching why parenting makes you a better person, I came across a surprising list of negative phrases in Google Autosuggest. Have a look below and see it for yourself.
My initial though was that of a betterment. What can possibly be wrong or negative about parenting or fatherhood? Sure, there are those moments where you are dead tired, changing diapers for the 2nd time within 10 minutes, millions of tossing and turning moves with the occasional kick in the balls, endless babbling to avoid sleeping and the list goes on. But, in the end, it’s all worth it.
Here are five reasons why parenting makes you a better person.
New Purpose:
How many of us make years resolutions or other promises that we’ll be thinner, wealthier, finding perfect love, taking that exotic trip and on. The most dangerous “In one day” attitude. What an empty promise. Not to anyone else but yourself. Parenting on the other hand gives you clear purpose in life. You’re now responsible for a soul. You’re responsible to ensuring safety. You have a lifetime task to educate, to pass on your knowledge and experience. You’ve taken on the role of a provider, educator, protector. And that’s a new purpose that can’t wait for lame excuses or delayed action.
Patience:
We all live in an instant gratification world. Perhaps one of the most important lesson learned is the amount of patience required to raise kids. It all depends on your personality but personally speaking, I’m not the most patient person around. Parenting changed that for the better. The amount of work required as a parent is incredible. I completely realized how much work and planning is involved. Most fathers especially the ones that don’t fully participate in raising their kids would say that they understand this. I say that’s B.S. Until you do it 24-7, you don’t understand.Being Present:
There’s video that I enjoyed watching with ex President Obama speaking to first year college students. The message is clear yet powerful: being present matters most when you’re at home with your family. And by being present I don’t mean present in the sense of physical form. Be present in the moment away from distraction of t.v., phones, tablets etc. It’s about enjoying the moment with your sons and/or daughters whether you’re on the floor playing, taking them for a walk in the stroller or helping them get on a slide in the park. Be present and you’ll never be disappointed.
Understanding what matters most:
It’s not your job, your big promotion, your BMW or your stock portfolio. It’s your family. It’s the first smile of your baby, the first sounds that he or she makes, it’s their first tooth, the first steps they take. Anyone can make money. But, no one can bring the time back when their child said mama or papa for the very first time. This is a hard realization however, if you think deeper, you’ll eventually get it.Becoming less selfish:
I’m a single child. Guess who’s being selfish? Once you’re a parent, you become less selfish. It’s about putting your child first. This touches upon priorities and what matters most that it teaches you to be less self centred. It’s not something that you can set out to change. You have to experience it for yourself to be able to give up that last piece of your favourite snack.
You appreciate your own parent(s) more:
One of the largest lessons learned is the deeper appreciating for your parents. I never imagined how much work it’s involved in being a parent. Having a full understanding of the work involved when having kids makes me a better person as I’m more grateful for everything that my grandmother and mother did for me, even though I didn’t realize this when I was young, single and free.
Conclusion
Parenting is an incredible amount of work. There are no short cuts. Although some parents may experience the negative side of parenting as seen above, I strongly believe that one will be a better person as a result of becoming a parent. It’s the realization of what matter most in life. It’s about deeper personal learnings that help you grow in a stronger and more balanced person.
What about you? What are some of your reasons that parenting made you a better person? I’ve noticed that a lot of content is from a mother’s perspective. Would love to hear both a mother’s and father’s input and how parenting changed you for the better. Please share your comments below.
